Can I walk with you? is a YouTube series by the filmmaker Thoraya. In it, she approaches people on the streets of New York, asking if she can walk with them. If you want to know how to talk to a stranger—or anyone, really—these videos are a masterclass.

♥️ And check out her film on unsent love letters: The most heartbreaking love letters from around the world…

“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.” Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Meditations offer many life lessons. In his journal, Marcus Aurelius considers how he must show up for others. As we ponder how we are thrown together with others, can we decide to come from a place of love? We don’t have to love everything about people, or everything that they do, but if we can love our common humanity, it’s a start.

In Book 6, Marcus urges himself to “Meditate often on the interconnectedness and mutual interdependence of all things in the universe.” (6.38)

In Book 7, he writes, “Everything is interwoven, and the web is holy; none of its parts are unconnected. They are composed harmoniously, and together they compose the world.” (7.9)

Read more on The Daily Stoic: We Were Made For Each Other: 32 Reminders From One Of History’s Most Powerful Figures.

Photo by The New York Public Library on Unsplash

In 12-step programs, the set aside prayer reminds everyone to set aside what they think they know.

In the service of connection, can we set aside what we think we know about another person and ask open-hearted questions in place of well-worn assumptions? Can we invite a shift in perspective? Can we lean into humility and foster a beginner’s mind?

In a world of digital isolation, we’ve forgotten how to truly see and be seen. Many of us need to rebuild our capacity for authentic connection. I know I do. I’ve been thinking about connecting in our quagmire of political polarization. I know that people are starved for connection. They want to belong, and they want to be heard. What are some questions we can ask that create an opening? Here are a few that I have been thinking about so I can be ready!

Here’s one practical conversation starter that has served me well is “How’s your family doing?” This invites people to talk about what’s important to them and to share struggles in their family and community. Listen to understand, not to respond. Validate the emotional experience but not necessarily the content. Reflect back what you’ve heard. Use phrases like “It sounds like you’re feeling…” or “That must be challenging for you.”

Many people are feeling economic pain or anxiety, and that can be an area of common ground.